Breaking the mould .....

There are times in life when doing something you have tried to avoid for over 

20+ years is the only way to move forward in life.

The moment I realised that if I wanted things to change 

to get better ........

I dreaded the fact that I had to break the continual circle my life has been taking.......

Mother- in- laws

how often have you heard both men and women moaning about their mother in laws ? 

How many people do you hear singing the praises of their Mother in laws ?

I can pretty honestly say I very rarely hear good things about other peoples mother in laws 

so why write this blog ?

well read on 

AGHHHHH make my head stop

If there was ever a time my life felt normal I would love to remember when .. 

My earliest memories are not the most pleasant,

my late teens were an alcohol fueled chaos 

my  early 20's saw the birth of my children but also a very unhappy marriage 

which had many lows and not very many highs.

When I met my current husband the years of damage caused by others 

has made everyday life lets just say a little tricky.

Now in my last few months of my 30's I can't help but wonder was I always destined to feel like this. 

I often joke that I would hate to be normal but in actual fact I would love to have some resemblance of 

what most would call a normal life.

it can be a lonely world at times......... looking at the world through my eyes

looking at the world through my eyes 

a world that seems to divide

one step forward five steps back but I cant step I only roll but that just don't sound the same

Its been one of those weeks and its only Wednesday !!

wakey wakey

After being awake until gone 4 this morning I was not surprised that waking this morning at 6:30 was lets say a little bit of a struggle !

I was however shocked that I must have been dreaming when I was woken I'm pretty sure that for many this would not be an unusual occurrence (dreaming that is..) 

However for me it is a big /HUGE thing I was dreaming .... a slightly strange dream granted but it was a dream not a nightmare not a vivid recollection of past events but a dream of strange events never been had or likely to ever happen. 

This would not cheer most people up but for me it is a massive step forward. 

I feel more invigorated than I would normally

Definitely more positive

and 100% less upset than I do most mornings 

Please please let this be a sign of things to come ... 

Kayla 

     xXx

Christmas and the Shit Storm in my mind.

Well as you have probably noticed I have been a tad quiet of late.....

The simple answer to my disappearance ill health and a shit storm in my mind !

Moving Forward

It would seem that in this house Monday this week was all about addressing mental health issues

there are times that every one feels a little down and fed up, but when that feeling goes from days to weeks to months and then years you have to admit to yourself that no matter how much you wear that mask of happiness and cheer you need HELP !